We live in a very confusing time for men in our society. The secular world paints men in all kinds of unsavory colors, from toxic and domineering to clueless and inept. It's easy to see why today's men don't know what they should do, how they should act, or what they should say. However, Christian husbands know what they should do because the Bible is their guidebook. Christian husbands have specific responsibilities to their wives and families.
What Is the Role of a Christian Husband?
Christian husbands are called to be the head of the household, the same way Christ is the head of the church. Men are not supposed to be dictators or oppressors but lead their families lovingly and sacrificially.
1. Providing for the Physical and Emotional Needs of Your Wife
Husbands are called to provide for their wives' physical and emotional needs. This means making time for physical intimacy and emotional intimacy. This also includes meeting her material needs and being aware of her well-being.
2. Nurturing Love and Respect
Men are called to nurture love and respect in their marriages. This means acting in your spouse's best interest and respecting her thoughts and ideas. Also, make sure she knows you see and value her abilities and appreciate her unique contributions to your union.
3. Honoring and Cherishing Your Wife
This means treating your wife with dignity and respect, including celebrating her strengths and affirming her worth. Make her feel valued and cherished through thoughtful actions and kindness.
4. Effectively Communicating Within the Marriage
Husbands are called to communicate effectively and respectfully with their wives, which builds understanding and unity. Exercise patience and empathy to help understand each other's perspectives.
5. Providing Spiritual Leadership to Your Family
These are crucial elements of being a Christian husband. You must have a relationship with God, spend time in the Word, and lead the family in matters of faith.
6. Protecting Your Family
A Christian husband should protect his family at all costs. This could be as simple as shutting down gossip or negative talk about his family or defending them in a crisis.
7. Providing Provision for Your Family
Husbands are called to provide for their families and oversee everyone's needs.
8. Serving Your Wife
Husbands are called to find the balance between authority and servanthood in their marriages. Men are not called to use their authority negatively, such as control. Instead, he should use his authority to reflect Christ's sacrificial love by serving his wife.
9. Supporting Your Wife
Husbands are called to support their wives. This means supporting her ambitions, decisions, etc.
10. Nurturing Emotional Intimacy
Take time to invest in emotionally connecting with your wife. This includes trusting your wife and being vulnerable with her. You can do this by having intentional conversations, doing activities together, and sharing gestures of affection.
11. Take Part in Actively Raising Godly children
Contrary to secular opinion, parenting is not the responsibility of one parent over the other. Nor is not parenting at all. Christian husbands are to take part in raising and nurturing their children. This also includes being a godly role model and teaching children values and character, manners, and investing in their spiritual growth and development.
12. Being the Spiritual Leader of Your Family
You are the spiritual leader of your family, which means having a relationship with the Lord, spending time with him daily, and reading the Word of God so you can make moral decisions for your family.
13. Leading Well
Men are called to be good leaders in their homes and do so in a loving and gentle manner.
14. Loving Well
This means loving your family unconditionally and letting them know how much you love them.
15. Continuing to Learn Your Wife
Most people learn all they can about their potential spouses and think there is nothing left to learn after the wedding. This is not true. We all grow and evolve. Make time to learn continually about your wife as she grows and changes.
16. Praying for Your Wife
Praying for your wife is crucial to a Christian marriage and helps strengthen your bond.
17. Praying with Your Wife
Making time to pray with your wife over her fears and concerns is another great way to show her you love her and care about the things that she cares about.
18. Appreciate Your Wife
Let your wife know how much you appreciate her and all she does for you and your family.
19. Be Loyal to Your Wife
There are many ways to be loyal to your wife. Being faithful to her is a given, but you can also do this by defending her, choosing to spend time with her over your friends, or taking the kids off her hands when she needs a break.
20. Be Gentle with Your Wife
Always be gentle with your wife in your words and actions.
21. Supporting Your Wife's Spiritual Growth
Husbands are called to support their wives' spiritual growth by giving them opportunities to go to church, be involved in Bible studies, and befriend other believers.
22. Understanding Submission
Men are not called to be tyrants in their authority over their families. They are to lead with love and gentleness, sacrificial love and selflessness. Often, submission gets misconstrued as control, and that is the last thing God intended. Instead, submission is about respecting and cooperating with each other.
23. Resolving Conflicts
Husbands are called to handle conflicts with humility, peace, and the desire for reconciliation. Resolve conflicts in a Biblical manner rather than focusing on winning an argument. Listen actively, try to understand your wife's perspective, and seek forgiveness if it is warranted. Extending grace and showing God's love is also key to resolving conflicts.
24. Find wisdom in Scripture
Spending time in the Scriptures daily will help inform and shape your behaviors. Finding wisdom in spiritual mentors will also help you understand the Biblical principles of love, selflessness, and servant leadership.
25. Seeking Godly Examples
One of the easiest ways to learn about your duties as a Christian is to read about godly husbands in the Bible. Some examples to get started are Abraham because he had unwavering trust in God, Joseph in his integrity, forgiveness, and resilience, and Boaz, who showed great kindness and generosity. You can also seek other men in your congregation to help mentor you or even search for podcasts on the topic of Christian husbandry.
If you are a new Christian husband, your role can seem daunting. Conversely, if you are a Christian man and have been married for years, you have a good foundation with your wife and God and can help lead others. Stepping into the role of a Christian husband comes with great responsibility to your wife and family. Spend time in Scripture, pray and talk to God, and find a great mentor to help guide you on your journey. God called you to this role, and with him and your wife by your side, you are bound to thrive and grow on your journey together.
Related: 21 Responsibilities All Christian Wives Have
