4 Signs of Unfaithfulness Every Christian Couple Should Know

I couldn’t stop scrolling through the scandalous secret messages on the screen of my husband’s phone. The red flags of his unfaithfulness were there, but I still didn’t want to believe it was true. I wiped away a teardrop that spilled on the screen as I fell further into his lair of lies and lust. The moon peeking through the curtains and the dim light from the cell phone were the only glimmer of light in that dark place. I knew I should stop reading those messages, but like a moth to a flame, I was captivated. The intimate imagery paraded itself in full color between my raging thoughts and answerless questions. 

• How could he? 
• Why would he?
• Who is she?

My breathing accelerated with every scroll of my finger until I felt like I would explode. Then, just as quietly as I snuck the phone from his side of the bed, I returned it. The toilet flushed, and my husband returned to the dark of our bedroom, having no idea the fury that awaited him in the stillness. 

Mostly everyone knows someone who has been unfaithful to his/her partner.   And Christian couples aren’t inoculated. Statistics vary; some report infidelity rates in marriage to be above 50 percent , while others measure the number at a mere 21 percent. I tend to believe the actual number is closer to the 50 percent mark, based on the many couples I have coached through the traumatic territory of infidelity. 

As I assessed my heartbreak that fateful night after learning about one of my husband’s affairs, I, like most other spouses who’ve been wounded, wondered why. We rack our brains trying to recover the missed warning signs. We become suspicious of everything. We second-guess ourselves and all of our abilities. It’s a pitiful place to be.

But you do not have to be caught off guard by your spouse’s unfaithfulness. Here are four warning signs and red flags that your spouse may be having an affair:

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Photo Credit: SWN Design via Canva Pro/Dana Che Williams, used with permission.